High up on the mountain you’ll find no old bill
You can stand with no clothes on and break wind at will.

It was a cold night, perhaps minus twenty Celsius, and I was standing outside a cabin in the mountains of central Norway. The snow squeaked underfoot and the hairs up my nose were starting to freeze. In the silence I could hear my heart beating and my breath was clouding in the crystalline air. What a great day, what an amazing thing this skiing game is, heavens above just look at the stars, hell it’s cold, am I going round and round or is it the mountains or is it the stars, who knows, who cares, what a great day, what about tomorrow, what about some more aquavit....

Most of us had only been skiing for a week. One had given up, but the rest of us were well and truly hooked. Despite the battering and the bruises, the crashes, the ribald laughter, the snow clogging every orifice, the thumping headaches the next day from aquavit and beer, we still came back every morning for more punishment from a gnarled and weather beaten Norwegian farmer called Arne Geilo.

Skiing has been my passion for thirty five years. It was this two week holiday back in 1968 that started the rot. Since then I have given up potentially lucrative careers as a dry cleaner delivery man, a city slicker in the unit trust business, a steeplechase jockey, and an actor to name but a few. Every year when the first leaves began to fall from the trees a little voice in the back of my head got louder and louder - it’s time to go - it’s time for the snow. I didn’t argue. It was a soft sell - the thrill of speed, the high from thin mountain air, the friendships born of like minded souls, and the challenge of the hill that never let you forget who was really the master.

I would like to think that you have come across this book for the same reason that still draws me every time I see the word ‘skiing’ in print - the little frisson of excitement, the feeling that you’re in the wrong place, the possibility that by reading about it you’re going to be that much closer to the action.

I would like to think that something on these pages will motivate you in this way, and get you even closer to the action of power skiing, controlled skiing, real skiing.

***

As a teach yourself book ‘Secrets of Better Skiing’ is slightly unusual. It starts a short way into the learning process because I do not believe that beginners can be taught initially from a book. After much observation it is obvious that there are an enormous number of skiers who seemed to have reached a dead end at quite an early stage of learning, and although keen to improve, are unable to do so. This book is dedicated to them!

Of course there are not really secrets of better skiing technique because many people know all about better skiing technique already. They are only a minority of skiers, however, so for the vast majority of skiers I see and observe, this book will appear as a revelation.

Let me give you an example. I often suggest to people that they should try going off trail and experience the delights of skiing on spring snow high up on a glacier with just a few friends, a picnic, and the solitude of the mountains. They usually look at me with a blank expression. Am I a madman to suggest that they should leave the crowded, man made, sometimes bumpy piste for the complete unknown? They invariably reply that they wouldn’t know how to ski in those conditions, or that it would be dangerous, or that it would waste a day of their valuable piste bashing time. The fact that the adventure I am suggesting could by no stretch of the imagination live up to their fears has no effect on them.

It’s a bit like the McDonalds syndrome. Would we rather try an unknown restaurant in a street of restaurants or the McDonalds slap bang in the middle of them? (I’d like to think that none of you try McDonalds but that’s getting off the point) It is the unknown that frightens people and puts them off. Familiarity does not breed contempt, it breeds contentment. We think that we are happier in a familiar situation and are therefore unwilling to try anything new. So this book does reveal facts that the vast majority of skiers did not know about before.

If you have reached the standard of skiing where this book starts, and can ski green runs through to red after a fashion, then you will be able to go off on adventures like the one I describe without having to improve your technique at all! I have never taken people on one of these trips who have been disappointed with the terrain they have skied over and the sights they have seen. There would have been times during such a trip when they forgot their technique completely and skied all the better for it.

There are of course the frustrated skiers out there of a more adventurous nature who would love to improve their technique, but do not really have an idea how to go about it. They really do want to ski off piste in powder snow, they really do want to master the bumps, they really would like to do powerful carved turns, they really would like to ski fast, they really would like to jump off rocks. Well it’s not difficult!

If you read this book and do what it says then you will be able to - I promise! I have made it as simple as I can with the minimum of technical stuff to achieve the maximum effect. I have taken a fairly light hearted approach to the whole business to minimise the bullshit that in places permeates the sport. Skiing is supposed to be fun - it will be even more fun when you have read ‘Secrets of Better Skiing’.

I do have one or two apologies to make. First of all I have mixed up miles with kilometers, Celsius with Fahrenheit, feet with metres etc. Marooned on the edge of Europe we have lately become a cultural melting pot that cannot tell its ounces from its grammes. That’s my excuse. Secondly I have never pandered to the philosophy of political correctness. If it’s fat it’s fat, and if like me it’s bald - it’s bald.

Do read the glossary at the end and refer to it whenever you need to. It is not just an explanation of terms but also a slightly more scientific approach to certain matters.

Read through this book once without worrying about the science and technique. Dip into it for a minute or two anywhere you like to memorise a useful snippet. Read it through again, thoroughly, spending more time on the practical and technical considerations, and it will turn you into an expert! I guarantee it!

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